At sixty-eight, I’m finally learning not just to be satisfied with the way God made me, but to be happy about it. He’s the Master and I’m the clay. He wouldn’t have let me turn out to be anything less than He’d intended—not as long as I was trying to follow His will. Of course, He had to keep smushing me together and remolding me during the process to make sure I turned out right.
Sure, I’d love to have been better looking. And to have had more hair. I couldn’t even have a Beatle-ish hair style in high school when the Fab Four first came to the United States to appear on the Ed Sullivan Show; my hair just didn’t grow prolifically in the right places. For that matter, what if He’d given me a body that stayed permanently trim—no matter how much food I ate or what kind.
And a lot more energy. When friends at a summer job nicknamed me Flash, it wasn’t because I was serving as the staff photographer. I was slow then, and I haven’t gotten any faster. “Hurry” isn’t in my dictionary.
Okay. Those things weren’t in God’s plan for me. But how could I miss something I’ve never had?
What if He’d led me to the perfect vocation right after college instead of taking me through six-plus years of teaching junior high English, ten years of helping economically disadvantaged folks find appropriate federally funded training, and almost nineteen years of computer programming?
Of course, I’d thought the programming was the vocation He’d been leading me to all along. Only when I was downsized unexpectedly did I realize I’d grown weary of keeping up with the changes in information technology. But He knew that would happen.
That downsizing led to a temporary at-home job, and when that ended it led to a part-time job at Target for three years. And it was during that time that I had both the time and the inclination to write my first novel. The first of eleven so far.
What? Did God have that in mind the whole time?
I believe He did. Looking back on various parts of my life—and the characteristics that make me me—I can see His hand placing those puzzle pieces on the board. They’re making more sense than ever. And I’m starting to appreciate the fact that I’m the me I am.
What about you? Do you like being who you are? What would you change if you could, and why do you think that would be important? Have you finished becoming the person God wants you to be? Please leave a comment.
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“On Aging Gracelessly” is only one of my two blogs. I post lyrics of the Christian songs I’ve written over the last fifty years on “As I Come Singing.” Check it out HERE if you’re interested. Free lead sheets (tune, words, and chords) are available for many of them. View the list HERE.
If you enjoy my writing, you’ll find a number of things to read on my website. Also music to listen to and music-related videos to watch.
My latest novel, The Devil and Pastor Gus, is out. If you’re interested, please check it out at Amazon.